Maybe not memories! I hate memory. Preciselywhat are it for, become encouraged by joy again? Most certainly not. Points existed, indeed there it stay. Atmospheres is something else entirely: an odor of wood’s sawdust quickly evokes this new sawmills of the alpine valleys, the brand new pinewoods. 
For a moment that seems truth be told there. ..
I get my personal day learning the brand new magazine, i then avoid and commence taking a look at the items around myself: bookcases, guides, pictures, memory loaded into the containers which i does not unlock; packets, toys strewn on the shelves clogging the fresh new the means to access instructions I cannot proper care of seeking, otherwise into hold becoming shelved. It doesn’t occurs. My personal silver screen Desktop contains a life, my life providing images: I have in your mind to pick him or her because of the subject, and make virtual albums. I could certainly do so. There are even the newest images however, I do not find them, privately structure. Its exposure is enough to continue my personal brain at peace. The sun renders a rectangular away from white into the solid wood floor one to reverberates temperatures about space, the new screen open, the fresh new day heavens however charming.
Twenty, twenty-2 yrs in such an intimate island plenty within the town, nearly unreal, to visit off and you may display, to go up and reflect. Exactly how much longer? Less, it can’t become, yet We bring it when you look at the trying to exalt feelings that years is wearing away. You skill for having such as an extended lifetime? a lady asked myself when you find yourself waiting around for the lady number: getting a task, a destination, a purpose! nevertheless I have particular systems, if i never rush I am able to have them to prolong my personal lifestyle.
Such option work are going to be and skilled somewhat later in life, but it’s shorter satisfying needless to say, one can not toss himself too far and ultimately makes do with feelings, atmospheres
I am aware I am not eternal, You will find arrived at be my personal age not long ago and yet I also become I am endless, you never know. You never know exactly who I truly are, specific remorse resurfaces, am i able to live with absolutely nothing to feel dissapointed about? I am able to stay the latest spots pass on to my understanding.
Late regarding the nights, from the window We understand the street, it is almost blank. People will come because of the. A few window is actually lit: don’t they’re going on holiday? What are it carrying out still to your, at the time?
Or even the smell of the sea
Fernando Pessoa, The ebook regarding Pain, created of the Bernardo Soares, secretary bookkeeper in the city off Lisbon. Translated by the Alfred Mac Adam, Direct Change, Boston, 1998
Regarding drawing off a dropping flat. Once the Alberto was born in 1927, the following incidents already been when he was about 10 years dated, almost within the 1937, and continued. Besano, Lombardia
The good thing about an emergency try interesting, hurtful and you can attractive. Not into victims, however for all of us it’s prepare for. Appeal is inspired by breaking the common routine, brightening within the notice from the a sharply different taking place. And another far more is there -I do believe- some thing dug up of involuntary otherwise prior intellectual habits: undetectable wants of payback, were unsuccessful achievements…
I was interested in catastrophes away from my personal early decades, these people were in the air. In school we acquired fascist and you will armed forces people: we’d to learn about muskets, grenades, anti fuel face masks in addition to complete army rating off simple soldier so you can standard! I became not ever been capable know it, but in the brand new interim brand new discreet fulfillment away from emergency is running within the myself.
Having Giorgio, who’d lots of toys and a great digital train about what he regularly continue oranges so you’re able to dry, we used to create railroad catastrophes: these were their teaches. Had it come exploit – I needed her or him plenty – I really don’t envision I might provides managed her or him by doing this. I comprised to possess my starvation from the attracting a lot more harmless scenes. Tanks had been the present toys, but I was lured by caterpillar music, you to definitely offered the option to visit everywhere, actually off-road.
