Many thanks for the remark, I appreciate it, really you might be encouraging us to rewrite the post to simplify my meaning. We hear you stating that my post seems like i will be advocating for subterfuge and manipulation, and then i would definitely agree that it is a bad idea if that were actually the case. But, we disagree that care is often subterfuge. You seem for you, I definitely agree that being completely honest from the beginning is a great idea like you are coming from the perspective of a person snugly embedded in the warmth of the polyamorous community, and.